Lakeville Journal Company mourns Mary Lou Estabrook

SALISBURY — The Lakeville Journal Co. lost a guiding light and source of constant inspiration with the death of Mary Lou Estabrook on May 3 at the age of 89.

A memorial service will be held Friday, May 28, 1 p.m. at the Salisbury Congregational Church. A full obituary is on page A2.

Mary Lou had been weakened by ailments in the past year but she remained vigorous, feisty and active in spite of it, even attending a broadcast of the Metropolitan Opera at the Mahaiwe Theater this spring, with her devoted husband, Robert Estabrook, steering her along in her wheelchair.

“She and Bob represented the very best of the tradition of community journalism,â€� said Conn. state Sen. Andrew Roraback (R-30). “Their work informed the public, engaged their readers in the important issues of the day, celebrated the people and places that make northwest Connecticut special and served as a sounding board for people to share ideas and opinions. 

“But at its core, The Lakeville Journal was always shaped by the values embodied by the Estabrooks’ integrity, compassion and a commitment to serve the community.â€�

“We will all miss Mary Lou deeply,� said Lakeville Journal Co. managing partner A. Whitney Ellsworth. “She had spunk, she made her opinions known, she was a perfect partner to Bob and a great photographer.�

“She was a sweet and gentle soul whose photographs captured the spirit of the Northwest Corner,â€� said William E. Little Jr., chairman of The Lakeville Journal Co. “People had great respect for her and she was  a wonderful partner and support for Bob.â€�

At home, at last,

in Lakeville

A peripatetic traveler, Mary Lou visited all corners of the globe with her husband. But Mary Lou was a small-town girl at heart, who cherished simple but profound treasures: her husband, her children (and their children), music, art and nature.

After Bob retired from a long career at The Washington Post, he brought his bride (as he always referred to her) to the Northwest Corner, where they spent their “retirement� facing the challenges of running small-town papers: The Lakeville Journal and The Millerton News.

Mary Lou was always soft-spoken, kind and gentle but at the same time she expected (and attained) a high level of performance from those around her, in all the many activities that interested her.

An artist’s eye

Anna Mae Kupferer, who has worked for the papers for more than three decades, recalled the meticulous attention Mary Lou would give to shooting images and then selecting just the right one to include in the newspaper, the supplements to the paper and the annual calendars.

“Mary Lou’s photos were painstakingly selected,â€� Kupferer said. “She shot rolls and rolls of black-and-white film, which she would process in the  on-premise darkroom. Hours would be spent selecting just the right photo to accompany each story and making sure each print was perfect.â€�

As a newspaperwoman in the pre-digital age, of course she most often shot in black and white, which could be quickly developed and printed at the newspaper office and then reproduced on the newsprint pages.

Marsden Epworth, who is editor of the Compass arts and entertainment section and The Journal Co. supplements recalled that, “For many years, Mary Lou was The Journal’s chief photographer, which meant, among other things, teaching people who had never had a camera before how to do the job.

“And one way she did this was by example. She had what every shooter needs: patience and tenacity. For an issue that fell near Father’s Day, back in the 1980s, she brought in a photograph of a dad bundling his offspring into a jacket outside Salisbury’s pharmacy. It was just a tender, tiny moment, but she caught it perfectly. That’s because she had stood on the street for more than an hour, waiting for the moment.�

Scott Heth is director of the Audubon Center in Sharon and, like many other nature lovers in the area, he remembers how minutely attentive Mary Lou was to changes in the landscape.

“My earliest recollection of her was through Audubon,� he said. “She was always carrying a camera and always capturing the wonders of nature on film; and the reports to me of what she had seen around town, where the flowers were blooming and what interesting wildlife she had seen, and encouraging me to let others know too.�

But, he said, “When I really got to know Mary Lou was during the years I was the director of the Salisbury Band. I remember the first rehearsal I conducted, not knowing what to expect and quite nervous. Bob and Mary Lou came through the door all smiles and Mary Lou immediately came over and welcomed me and promptly took her place in the flute section. Rehearsal after rehearsal and performance after performance Bob and Mary Lou, together, shared their talents and passion for music with the Salisbury Band, and consistently supported me and the members of the band with compliments and words of encouragement. This I will never forget.�

No false notes

It wasn’t only the Salisbury Band that benefited from Mary Lou’s involvement. She was also a member for several years of the Salisbury Bell Choir, not only for the music but also because of its  complexity.

“She was intrigued by the manner in which bell music is played, since it is so different from reading an orchestral score,� said Mary Davidson. “She was meticulous in marking her music for her assigned notes. On several occasions she accompanied the bell choir with her flute.�

Lee Collins, former director of the Salisbury Band, said that Mary Lou played the piccolo for the local group but played the flute with the Torrington Symphony.

“We alway end our concerts with ‘Stars and Stripes Forever,’ with its famous piccolo obligato,� Collins said. “It’s a demanding piece, a showcase piece. It was Bob who told us that, you know, the Torrington Symphony did ‘Stars and Stripes Forever’ and of course Mary Lou did the obligato.

“I mentioned it to Mary Lou and she commented later that the one the Salisbury Band plays is in B flat and the one that Torrington plays is in A flat. In other words, she had to play the whole thing in a different key. It was a tour de force to be able to play a difficult piece like that in two different keys.

“She was a faithful member and always in good humor and ready for everything.�

No matter what endeavor she was engaged in, she certainly always was ready for anything. And those skills were tested. She and her husband shared an indomitable spirit and a can-do attitude. They traveled often, to distant points of the planet, and coped with whatever circumstances nature and world politics thrust upon them. She and Bob recounted their travels and travails with great modesty, always.  

‘A great woman’

Of all the comments that community members shared about Mary Lou this week, perhaps the one that best sums her up are the words Scott Heth uttered when he heard of her passing: “She was a great woman.�

“Obviously, her photography was fantastic but she was also a very careful, thoughtful person, and a real good friend,� said Salisbury resident Carl Williams.

Conn. state Rep. Roberta Willis (D-64) said, “Mary Lou always greeted you with warmth and a welcoming smile.  She was a soft-spoken, gentle woman who spoke compellingly through her photographs, revealing her affection for her community.â€�

Sen. Roraback also commented that, “While diminutive in stature, she was a giant in every other way. With a twinkle in her eye, her warm smile and gentle way accompanied a drive to achieve and contribute to the life of our community and our state.

“Mary Lou’s hallmark remains her love of life, her love of her husband of so many years and her love of learning and exploration. Her curiosity never subsided and she shared freely of the joy she drew from learning. She and Bob were the best example I know of a couple who complemented one another completely.â€�

Latest News

Fresh perspectives in Norfolk Library film series

Diego Ongaro

Photo submitted

Parisian filmmaker Diego Ongaro, who has been living in Norfolk for the past 20 years, has composed a collection of films for viewing based on his unique taste.

The series, titled “Visions of Europe,” began over the winter at the Norfolk Library with a focus on under-the-radar contemporary films with unique voices, highlighting the creative richness and vitality of the European film landscape.

Keep ReadingShow less
New ground to cover and plenty of groundcover

Young native pachysandra from Lindera Nursery shows a variety of color and delicate flowers.

Dee Salomon

It is still too early to sow seeds outside, except for peas, both the edible and floral kind. I have transplanted a few shrubs and a dogwood tree that was root pruned in the fall. I have also moved a few hellebores that seeded in the near woods back into their garden beds near the house; they seem not to mind the few frosty mornings we have recently had. In years past I would have been cleaning up the plant beds but I now know better and will wait at least six weeks more. I have instead found the most perfect time-consuming activity for early spring: teasing out Vinca minor, also known as periwinkle and myrtle, from the ground in places it was never meant to be.

Planting the stuff in the first place is my biggest ever garden regret. It was recommended to me as a groundcover that would hold together a hillside, bare after a removal of invasive plants save for a dozen or so trees. And here we are, twelve years later; there is vinca everywhere. It blankets the hillside and has crept over the top into the woods. It has made its way left and right. I am convinced that vinca is the plastic of the plant world. The stuff won’t die. (The name Vinca comes from the Latin ‘vincire’ which means ‘to bind or fetter.’) Last year I pulled a bunch and left it strewn on the roof of the root cellar for 6 months and the leaves were still green.

Keep ReadingShow less
Matza Lasagne by 'The Cook and the Rabbi'

Culinary craftsmanship intersects with spiritual insights in the wonderfully collaborative book, “The Cook and the Rabbi.” On April 14 at Oblong Books in Rhinebeck (6422 Montgomery Street), the cook, Susan Simon, and the rabbi, Zoe B. Zak, will lead a conversation about food, tradition, holidays, resilience and what to cook this Passover.

Passover, marked by the traditional seder meal, holds profound significance within Jewish culture and for many carries extra meaning this year at a time of great conflict. The word seder, meaning “order” in Hebrew, unfolds in a 15-step progression intertwining prayers, blessings, stories, and songs that narrate the ancient saga of the liberation of the Israelites from slavery. It’s a narrative that has endured for over two millennia, evolving with time yet retaining its essence, a theme echoed beautifully in “The Cook and the Rabbi.”

Keep ReadingShow less
Housy baseball drops 3-2 to Northwestern

Freshman pitcher Wyatt Bayer threw three strikeouts when HVRHS played Northwestern April 9.

Riley Klein

WINSTED — A back-and-forth baseball game between Housatonic Valley Regional High School and Northwestern Regional High School ended 3-2 in favor of Northwestern on Tuesday, April 9.

The Highlanders played a disciplined defensive game and kept errors to a minimum. Wyatt Bayer pitched a strong six innings for HVRHS, but the Mountaineers fell behind late and were unable to come back in the seventh.

Keep ReadingShow less